Loss.  No one wants to talk about loss, and no one wants to experience it.  Most of our friends have feeble comfort to offer us in a time of loss, and we are often too tender to hear that they care.

My losses are just the same as yours.  Maybe this is your first loss, or maybe you have had a multi-loss pile-up and are utterly beaten.  Loss is about change.  And we don’t like change.  You might be feeling pitied, alone, empty, ashamed, burdened, or just flabergasted.

We are searching for who we are now that this has happened to us. After a loss we need to find a “new normal”. We might want to feel (old) normal again, but we are changed by this experience and can not be the same again. We definitely did not chose everything about our lives, but know that God did.

The first steps are to feel.  God gives us time to feel and when we process what we feel, we grow. It is good to talk to someone who is a good listener.  Seek a compassionate listener and not advice giver. You know who they are.  Try to find a time each day to be alone.  Go for a walk, and pray, or cry.  You are growing and healing into a new person. Projects are good, but they can distract you from healing.

God is growing a gift in your heart.  A gift of your heart isn’t head wisdom, it is a heart that is sensitive, oh so sensitive to God.  A heart is a heavy thing to bear, but is such a precious gift.

Now you may be more sensitive, you cry at movies, you cry at cute children, you cry over other peoples babies, you cry over good people working hard, you cry over Christmas carols.  There is nothing wrong in having a sensitive heart.  This is the heart that God has for us.  He longs for us the way we long for those we lost.

Everyday I remind myself that God wants me to wait as expectantly on Him, with bated breath, as I did for the babies not meant to be born into my arms.

Thank you, God, for the gift of a sensitive heart.  I will wait expectantly on You.